








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 57 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 157 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1760 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,260 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1095 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1928 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1330 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1907 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $543,802 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | uzi | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | PotatoePeeker TTV | 53% | 73 |
| #3 | Fex | 49% | 45 |
| #4 | Woodzy | 40% | 25 |
| #5 | ᶜᵒᵐʳᵃᵈᵉ ᵐⁱˡᵏ | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | uzi | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | PotatoePeeker TTV | 53% | 73 |
| #3 | Fex | 49% | 45 |
| #4 | Woodzy | 40% | 25 |
| #5 | ᶜᵒᵐʳᵃᵈᵉ ᵐⁱˡᵏ | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Woodzy | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | ᶜᵒᵐʳᵃᵈᵉ ᵐⁱˡᵏ | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PotatoePeeker TTV | 207 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | Fex | 158 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | Woodzy | 87 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #4 | uzi | 32 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | ᶜᵒᵐʳᵃᵈᵉ ᵐⁱˡᵏ | 28 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PotatoePeeker TTV | +2.55 | 74 | 65 |
| #2 | uzi | +1.85 | 89 | 25 |
| #3 | Woodzy | +1.49 | 79 | 60 |
| #4 | Fex | +0.26 | 70 | 68 |
| #5 | ᶜᵒᵐʳᵃᵈᵉ ᵐⁱˡᵏ | -0.56 | 75 | 71 |





