








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1458 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 256 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 207 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 121 matches | ||
| Premier | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




93 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8871 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,681 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 14790 | 43% |
| Smokes | 6960 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5279 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 7652 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,287,486 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 471 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | achkully | 60% | 87 |
| #5 | sparkle | 59% | 583 |
| #6 | aryan | 59% | 240 |
| #7 | WoToHoLoMoCoDoAoUoYoGoSoPoVoKo | 56% | 192 |
| #8 | Hazamer | 49% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halter | 201 | 0.0210 |
| #2 | sparkle | 87 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | darky | 62 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | WoToHoLoMoCoDoAoUoYoGoSoPoVoKo | 46 | 0.0127 |
| #5 | aryan | 31 | 0.0068 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halter | 2224 | 0.23 | 54 min |
| #2 | sparkle | 1515 | 0.14 | 31 min |
| #3 | WoToHoLoMoCoDoAoUoYoGoSoPoVoKo | 1108 | 0.31 | 23 min |
| #4 | darky | 779 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #5 | aryan | 475 | 0.10 | 10 min |





