








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 646 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 203 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 180 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 91 matches | ||
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




108 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7882 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,887 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7071 | 40% |
| Smokes | 3544 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3986 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3286 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,815,724 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 701 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halter | 62% | 388 |
| #2 | achkully | 60% | 99 |
| #3 | itsjustblue | 59% | 583 |
| #4 | aryan | 59% | 164 |
| #5 | darky | 58% | 471 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Halter | 160 | 0.0213 |
| #2 | itsjustblue | 69 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | darky | 62 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | WoToHoLoMoCoDoAoUoYoGoSoPoVoKo | 33 | 0.0131 |
| #5 | aryan | 28 | 0.0092 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | itsjustblue | 3275 | 0.29 | 80 min |
| #2 | Halter | 1704 | 0.23 | 43 min |
| #3 | darky | 778 | 0.09 | 15 min |
| #4 | WoToHoLoMoCoDoAoUoYoGoSoPoVoKo | 722 | 0.29 | 15 min |
| #5 | aryan | 389 | 0.13 | 8 min |





