








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 817 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1044 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 147 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7738 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 44,462 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11942 | 27% |
| Smokes | 12976 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 11518 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 8026 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,595,761 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1240 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RaBB1T | 58% | 320 |
| #2 | platu | 57% | 237 |
| #3 | †ℙ𝕒𝕟𝟙𝕔 | 56% | 75 |
| #4 | EnderZ | 54% | 113 |
| #5 | EK IS N BOK!!!! | 52% | 295 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | sAinT ... | ... | 50% | 457 |
| #8 | ☢ S.T.A.L.K.E.R ☢ | 49% | 155 |
| #9 | prof Blue | 49% | 268 |
| #10 | DoctorPoctor5_ZA | 44% | 106 |
| #11 | SymmaTree | 44% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prof Blue | 15 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | platu | 14 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | sAinT ... | ... | 13 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | EK IS N BOK!!!! | 10 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | RaBB1T | 8 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sAinT ... | ... | 1107 | 0.11 | 28 min |
| #2 | RaBB1T | 1052 | 0.16 | 26 min |
| #3 | CrUnKz™ | 641 | 0.08 | 17 min |
| #4 | EK IS N BOK!!!! | 504 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #5 | prof Blue | 435 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoctorPoctor5_ZA | +1.91 | 67 | 39 |
| #2 | platu | +1.78 | 64 | 41 |
| #3 | EK IS N BOK!!!! | +0.90 | 42 | 57 |
| #4 | EnderZ | +0.64 | 57 | 63 |
| #5 | ☢ S.T.A.L.K.E.R ☢ | +0.35 | 62 | 64 |





