








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1018 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 116 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 58 matches | ||
| Wingman | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 73 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1781 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,214 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1703 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1923 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1271 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1317 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,266,825 of utility $283 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1552 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | nipsu | 45% | 31 |
| #7 | Migeel | 43% | 138 |
| #8 | Se on söne perkele | 43% | 122 |
| #9 | Milo pistelee | 43% | 28 |
| #10 | Maanmittari | 32% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Garry | 44 | 0.0129 |
| #2 | S3kU-L!Ä | 30 | 0.0164 |
| #3 | Clouxo | 18 | 0.0161 |
| #4 | se on vaan kake | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Milo pistelee | 9 | 0.0158 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | se on vaan kake | 661 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #2 | Garry | 286 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #3 | Se on söne perkele | 233 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Migeel | 209 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | S3kU-L!Ä | 208 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nipsu | +5.51 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | Garry | +5.42 | 54 | 40 |
| #3 | se on vaan kake | +4.49 | 59 | 51 |
| #4 | Clouxo | +2.23 | 26 | 57 |
| #5 | Maanmittari | +1.83 | 56 | 69 |





