










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1049 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 604 matches | ||
| Wingman | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 60 matches | ||
| Renown | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 72 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7723 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 40,350 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12959 | 32% |
| Smokes | 8809 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 10402 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 8180 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,262,435 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | vaCCa_ee | 49% | 306 |
| #11 | ★LePapa | 49% | 280 |
| #12 | SWiCK | 47% | 315 |
| #13 | lõuna-rannik crack for fun | 46% | 56 |
| #14 | Viron kenraali | 45% | 159 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Viron kenraali | 12 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | SWiCK | 8 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | vaCCa_ee | 7 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | PotatoMees | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | lääne-rannik huang he | 4 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SWiCK | 988 | 0.15 | 31 min |
| #2 | ★LePapa | 507 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #3 | sordimaffia | 432 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | vaCCa_ee | 390 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #5 | Viron kenraali | 274 | 0.08 | 6 min |





