








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 964 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 283 matches | ||
| Wingman | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




187 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7962 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,533 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2762 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2185 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2177 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2409 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,605,422 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2183 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seviB | 58% | 167 |
| #2 | JIIPEE | 57% | 170 |
| #3 | v1hu | 57% | 213 |
| #4 | HedelmaPeli | 56% | 123 |
| #5 | beetlejuice | 52% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Tostakumärepäsen | 51% | 51 |
| #7 | beetlejuice | 49% | 45 |
| #8 | JonttuJT | 48% | 348 |
| #9 | jimib | 44% | 45 |
| #10 | RASMUS. | 44% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JonttuJT | 49 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | seviB | 29 | 0.0091 |
| #3 | HedelmaPeli | 28 | 0.0113 |
| #4 | v1hu | 24 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | beetlejuice | 16 | 0.0137 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JonttuJT | 606 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #2 | v1hu | 468 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #3 | HedelmaPeli | 418 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #4 | seviB | 291 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | jimib | 146 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | santerin iskä | +3.05 | 87 | 48 |
| #2 | v1hu | +2.75 | 82 | 59 |
| #3 | seviB | +2.22 | 75 | 51 |
| #4 | beetlejuice | +2.05 | 82 | 27 |
| #5 | beetlejuice | +1.86 | 89 | 21 |





