










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 58 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
273 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 509 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 260 | 51% |
| Smokes | 104 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 62 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 83 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $47,705 of utility $31 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm | 44% | 9 |
| #2 | Faisch | 39% | 33 |
| #3 | Tha | 36% | 14 |
| #4 | Psychedelic | 32% | 25 |
| #5 | Alloyy | 32% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faisch | 9 | 0.0143 |
| #2 | Alloyy | 6 | 0.0130 |
| #3 | Tha | 4 | 0.0147 |
| #4 | The Big 'Stein | 4 | 0.0199 |
| #5 | Meownold | 2 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Warlix | +7.42 | 90 | 82 |
| #2 | mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm | +5.18 | 75 | 57 |
| #3 | Faisch | +3.59 | 62 | 50 |
| #4 | Meownold | +3.53 | 67 | 51 |
| #5 | Alloyy | +3.52 | 61 | 37 |





