








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 446 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 267 matches | ||
| Faceit | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




70 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4104 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,495 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8645 | 37% |
| Smokes | 5111 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 5740 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3999 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $870,670 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2084 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | sfw | 53% | 43 |
| #8 | maq | 51% | 45 |
| #9 | peep | 48% | 145 |
| #10 | Deku | 47% | 32 |
| #11 | no opponent | 43% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil gooblin | 12 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | peep | 9 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Tater Thot | 9 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | bitch respecter | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | ✪t.tv/bigskewed | 7 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bitch respecter | 709 | 0.21 | 17 min |
| #2 | peep | 485 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | lil gooblin | 369 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | ✪t.tv/bigskewed | 202 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #5 | PreMiuM | 169 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sfw | +2.16 | 64 | 58 |
| #2 | PreMiuM | +1.11 | 85 | 67 |
| #3 | maq | +0.89 | 72 | 68 |
| #4 | bitch respecter | +0.79 | 79 | 62 |
| #5 | ✪t.tv/bigskewed | +0.60 | 39 | 82 |





