








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1501 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 281 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




70 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4763 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,704 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4251 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2853 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2133 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3467 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,334,212 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 320 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil'caesars | 69% | 72 |
| #2 | kcw- | 67% | 27 |
| #3 | coquettepopcorn♡𓍯𓂃 | 64% | 76 |
| #4 | rizure | 60% | 50 |
| #5 | whoopzpie | 55% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Lee Chae Young - 이채영 | 43% | 23 |
| #11 | GAMMA | 40% | 30 |
| #12 | Shiro | 39% | 99 |
| #13 | 叫んだ | 39% | 72 |
| #14 | Kuro | 34% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil'caesars | 22 | 0.0163 |
| #2 | coquettepopcorn♡𓍯𓂃 | 17 | 0.0117 |
| #3 | Shiro | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | whoopzpie | 7 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | GAMMA | 4 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shiro | 449 | 0.21 | 12 min |
| #2 | Crissa | 337 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #3 | 叫んだ | 213 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | rizure | 158 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | lil'caesars | 154 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rizure | +5.59 | 86 | 59 |
| #2 | Skadi | +4.09 | 93 | 53 |
| #3 | Kuro | +3.43 | 75 | 43 |
| #4 | Shiro | +3.05 | 48 | 59 |
| #5 | Crissa | +1.41 | 58 | 57 |





