








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 318 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 59 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2727 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,452 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1295 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1650 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1625 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1882 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $814,247 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 411 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | 65% | 46 |
| #2 | emil | 64% | 50 |
| #3 | Locomotive engineer | 58% | 59 |
| #4 | GameAndLive | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | MultiNormann | 53% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MultiNormann | 9 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | emil | 7 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | 7 | 0.0081 |
| #4 | Locomotive engineer | 5 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | PrincessMaja | 5 | 0.0105 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MultiNormann | 241 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | 167 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | emil | 163 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | 001 | 135 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| #5 | levlQuattro | 99 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Princess Maja res | +3.38 | 65 | 58 |
| #2 | TeNsu Son Of Satan | +2.85 | 75 | 70 |
| #3 | GameAndLive | +2.43 | 69 | 54 |
| #4 | levlQuattro | +0.72 | 45 | 67 |
| #5 | PrincessMaja | -0.11 | 27 | 57 |





