








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1714 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 287 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 187 matches | ||
| Faceit | 172 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 39 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 106 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13221 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 43,366 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10159 | 23% |
| Smokes | 12505 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 12341 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 8361 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,401,663 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 957 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | we miss Æ | 61% | 76 |
| #2 | ⚡️L | 58% | 285 |
| #3 | lun | 57% | 338 |
| #4 | J3FF3R | 56% | 526 |
| #5 | Pinky | 55% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | lun | 57% | 338 |
| #4 | J3FF3R | 56% | 526 |
| #5 | Pinky | 55% | 65 |
| #6 | n8 | 54% | 327 |
| #7 | LifeIsAfkinMovie | 52% | 467 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lun | 34 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | ⚡️L | 27 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | J3FF3R | 19 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | LifeIsAfkinMovie | 18 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | we miss Æ | 14 | 0.0090 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lun | 1715 | 0.25 | 37 min |
| #2 | J3FF3R | 1352 | 0.13 | 24 min |
| #3 | LifeIsAfkinMovie | 1185 | 0.13 | 29 min |
| #4 | ⚡️L | 792 | 0.14 | 20 min |
| #5 | n8 | 667 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ❤️I go to school by bus | +2.76 | 71 | 68 |
| #2 | we miss Æ | +2.16 | 77 | 56 |
| #3 | ⚡️L | +1.27 | 73 | 69 |
| #4 | lun | +0.77 | 61 | 59 |
| #5 | J3FF3R | +0.55 | 73 | 53 |





