








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 657 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 419 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




66 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7393 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,801 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5235 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6264 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4779 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4523 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,544,561 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 968 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SorryForMS ⇄ Trading | 53% | 30 |
| #2 | ☑︎☄︎ H⏳RRY ☄︎☑ | 50% | 44 |
| #3 | Pookie | 49% | 235 |
| #4 | ALFA | 47% | 32 |
| #5 | [@c]Del | 45% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ALFA | 47% | 32 |
| #5 | [@c]Del | 45% | 33 |
| #6 | kassoulet blesser | 42% | 60 |
| #7 | Saulc | 40% | 70 |
| #8 | Marco Pyright | 32% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marco Pyright | 11 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Pookie | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | kassoulet blesser | 9 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | Saulc | 4 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | ☑︎☄︎ H⏳RRY ☄︎☑ | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pookie | 772 | 0.16 | 18 min |
| #2 | Marco Pyright | 196 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Saulc | 196 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | ☑︎☄︎ H⏳RRY ☄︎☑ | 193 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #5 | kassoulet blesser | 159 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MA | +2.53 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | ALFA | +0.98 | 84 | 68 |
| #3 | ☑︎☄︎ H⏳RRY ☄︎☑ | +0.72 | 52 | 69 |
| #4 | SorryForMS ⇄ Trading | +0.16 | 49 | 67 |
| #5 | [@c]Del | -0.07 | 71 | 49 |





