








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 290 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 179 matches | ||
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1643 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,348 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2587 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3373 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2602 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1786 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $786,189 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | foxiasty | 53% | 125 |
| #2 | GIlioner :3 | 52% | 156 |
| #3 | El nino prime | 50% | 157 |
| #4 | johnnycarlson | 49% | 239 |
| #5 | Kamilocek126 | 46% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | El nino prime | 50% | 157 |
| #4 | johnnycarlson | 49% | 239 |
| #5 | Kamilocek126 | 46% | 78 |
| #6 | Carles Puyol | 42% | 150 |
| #7 | Morased | 40% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El nino prime | 13 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | GIlioner :3 | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Kamilocek126 | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | johnnycarlson | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Carles Puyol | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | johnnycarlson | 1040 | 0.20 | 22 min |
| #2 | GIlioner :3 | 726 | 0.20 | 14 min |
| #3 | El nino prime | 437 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #4 | foxiasty | 265 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | Carles Puyol | 160 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | foxiasty | +3.19 | 80 | 42 |
| #2 | GIlioner :3 | +1.64 | 66 | 43 |
| #3 | johnnycarlson | +1.55 | 72 | 59 |
| #4 | El nino prime | +0.90 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | Kamilocek126 | -1.34 | 63 | 52 |





