








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 177 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2094 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,267 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1815 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2147 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1239 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2066 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $699,349 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toast | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | noescoper rodrygues | 61% | 23 |
| #3 | lostᗜˬᗜ | 61% | 33 |
| #4 | R0CK3T CAMEL0 | 60% | 63 |
| #5 | Ikuyo Kita | 54% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | noescoper rodrygues | 61% | 23 |
| #3 | lostᗜˬᗜ | 61% | 33 |
| #4 | R0CK3T CAMEL0 | 60% | 63 |
| #5 | Ikuyo Kita | 54% | 100 |
| #6 | Azuggerꑭ | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toast | 12 | 0.0202 |
| #2 | lostᗜˬᗜ | 11 | 0.0165 |
| #3 | noescoper rodrygues | 7 | 0.0167 |
| #4 | Ikuyo Kita | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Azuggerꑭ | 5 | 0.0123 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ikuyo Kita | 204 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | noescoper rodrygues | 77 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #3 | R0CK3T CAMEL0 | 64 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | toast | 53 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | lostᗜˬᗜ | 34 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lostᗜˬᗜ | +4.17 | 53 | 46 |
| #2 | toast | +1.72 | 42 | 36 |
| #3 | Ritsu Tainaka | +1.64 | 59 | 59 |
| #4 | Azuggerꑭ | +0.99 | 54 | 36 |
| #5 | R0CK3T CAMEL0 | +0.15 | 31 | 45 |





