








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 98 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 194 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2543 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,294 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2787 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2231 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1725 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2551 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $561,142 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 144 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jokusemmoneh | 235 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | wiltuz | 222 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #3 | Sipunak | 178 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #4 | Viljak | 129 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | Arttu | 127 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wiltuz | +2.47 | 78 | 73 |
| #2 | Viljak | +1.97 | 62 | 66 |
| #3 | Jokusemmoneh | +1.78 | 86 | 70 |
| #4 | 𝔸𝕥𝕥𝕖. | +1.66 | 74 | 58 |
| #5 | MrMaxiCola | +0.92 | 83 | 61 |





