








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1114 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 598 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7751 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,816 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6189 | 24% |
| Smokes | 7792 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5890 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 5945 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,820,770 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 160 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vvville | 54% | 93 |
| #2 | Viljak | 53% | 66 |
| #3 | MrMaxiCola | 53% | 151 |
| #4 | Jokusemmoneh | 53% | 274 |
| #5 | Sipunak | 52% | 458 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrMaxiCola | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Sipunak | 2 | 0.0002 |
| #3 | Jokusemmoneh | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jokusemmoneh | 1274 | 0.21 | 38 min |
| #2 | Sipunak | 1137 | 0.11 | 30 min |
| #3 | Tietynlainen pelaaja | 1137 | 0.19 | 24 min |
| #4 | Arttu | 532 | 0.06 | 16 min |
| #5 | Jakeee | 398 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wiltuz | +3.00 | 80 | 75 |
| #2 | Jokusemmoneh | +1.65 | 85 | 72 |
| #3 | Viljak | +0.90 | 61 | 67 |
| #4 | Jakeee | +0.17 | 67 | 68 |
| #5 | vvville | +0.10 | 74 | 66 |





