








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 435 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 86 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2747 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,074 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1821 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1278 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1545 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2430 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $261,904 of utility $31 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 738 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SwedenPig | 50% | 34 |
| #2 | Snay | 48% | 107 |
| #3 | Doctor_Monty | 45% | 31 |
| #4 | TIGER_DK | 45% | 121 |
| #5 | dragon $layer | 44% | 129 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | lindsey1208 | 34% | 190 |
| #11 | Lecty Eisenach | 32% | 34 |
| #12 | PsychoticMutt (Henny) | 31% | 48 |
| #13 | D0ggy94 | 30% | 33 |
| #14 | Quickfaith | 29% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AE_Migwel | 15 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Vaaben ლ(-_-ლ) | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Snay | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | dragon $layer | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | TIGER_DK | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vaaben ლ(-_-ლ) | 351 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #2 | AE_Migwel | 281 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #3 | Snay | 262 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | dragon $layer | 158 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | TIGER_DK | 149 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AE_Migwel | +3.40 | 72 | 55 |
| #2 | Snay | +2.50 | 59 | 62 |
| #3 | SwedenPig | +1.53 | 46 | 44 |
| #4 | TIGER_DK | +1.53 | 54 | 54 |
| #5 | dragon $layer | +1.00 | 25 | 57 |





