








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1244 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,940 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3030 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2172 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1967 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1771 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $169,103 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PV | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | jeryfizzle | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | SALTY | 재수 없어 | 50% | 14 |
| #4 | Ikou | 49% | 86 |
| #5 | loogah | 47% | 113 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | loogah | 47% | 113 |
| #6 | Draven | 47% | 109 |
| #7 | DadBodAaron | 45% | 49 |
| #8 | Formerly[...] | 40% | 35 |
| #9 | drink.milk | 24% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | loogah | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Draven | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | jeryfizzle | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Ikou | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Formerly[...] | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Draven | 374 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | loogah | 305 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #3 | Ikou | 171 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | jeryfizzle | 132 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | Formerly[...] | 100 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Draven | +1.65 | 80 | 68 |
| #2 | jeryfizzle | +0.72 | 67 | 71 |
| #3 | Ikou | +0.28 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | loogah | -0.11 | 69 | 72 |
| #5 | h0ppi | -0.35 | 66 | 81 |





