








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 640 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 436 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Wingman | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




135 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7298 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,465 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12323 | 40% |
| Smokes | 6370 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 5006 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 6766 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,497,665 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 828 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | purple crayon swallower | 63% | 52 |
| #2 | nicozoro | 56% | 55 |
| #3 | RiiZe | 53% | 47 |
| #4 | MAKSI152 | 53% | 177 |
| #5 | Bash1ra | 50% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Bims | 44% | 110 |
| #12 | Poulpinet | 43% | 68 |
| #13 | Xardles | 42% | 45 |
| #14 | Wavy | 41% | 83 |
| #15 | pp | 40% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wavy | 29 | 0.0179 |
| #2 | NYAKUZA kiishiio | 25 | 0.0244 |
| #3 | Poulpinet | 18 | 0.0143 |
| #4 | MAKSI152 | 17 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | pp | 10 | 0.0074 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bims | 681 | 0.31 | 17 min |
| #2 | MAKSI152 | 671 | 0.19 | 15 min |
| #3 | pp | 432 | 0.32 | 9 min |
| #4 | RiiZe | 337 | 0.34 | 9 min |
| #5 | purple crayon swallower | 284 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RiiZe | +3.91 | 77 | 73 |
| #2 | Bims | +2.16 | 58 | 66 |
| #3 | Bash1ra | +1.79 | 81 | 51 |
| #4 | Apbowler | +1.54 | 73 | 67 |
| #5 | nicozoro | +1.48 | 51 | 65 |





