








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 197 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 167 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4907 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,375 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6661 | 33% |
| Smokes | 6133 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4115 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3466 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,282,494 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 270 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Respect | 63% | 64 |
| #2 | Tovr | 60% | 48 |
| #3 | savg | 52% | 27 |
| #4 | Jamie | 49% | 65 |
| #5 | milk | 48% | 267 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Toaster | 43% | 58 |
| #10 | typ1K4L | 38% | 73 |
| #11 | izzy♡ | 36% | 36 |
| #12 | Gamige | 35% | 54 |
| #13 | Cleb | 33% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamie | 10 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | Cleb | 7 | 0.0085 |
| #3 | milk | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | typ1K4L | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Toaster | 5 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | milk | 584 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #2 | Gamige | 312 | 0.29 | 9 min |
| #3 | Respect | 234 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #4 | Apothecarious | 227 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #5 | Jamie | 201 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Respect | +2.16 | 84 | 62 |
| #2 | savg | +2.00 | 70 | 52 |
| #3 | Jamie | +0.96 | 62 | 62 |
| #4 | Tovr | +0.94 | 60 | 72 |
| #5 | Apothecarious | +0.59 | 62 | 67 |





