








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1898 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,642 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1054 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1893 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1174 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1521 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $315,782 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | thaisoni | 65% | 69 |
| #2 | yuh | 62% | 45 |
| #3 | 𝕽𝖊𝖋𝖑𝖊𝖝 | 62% | 50 |
| #4 | La Reyna <3 | 61% | 109 |
| #5 | (っ◔◡◔)っ | 58% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | La Reyna <3 | 61% | 109 |
| #5 | (っ◔◡◔)っ | 58% | 64 |
| #6 | M4fChees~ | 53% | 96 |
| #7 | Vaniks | 50% | 10 |
| #8 | stanneke2009 | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M4fChees~ | 12 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | 𝕽𝖊𝖋𝖑𝖊𝖝 | 7 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | thaisoni | 6 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | La Reyna <3 | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | stanneke2009 | 2 | 0.0094 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | (っ◔◡◔)っ | 204 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | M4fChees~ | 124 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | La Reyna <3 | 119 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | yuh | 71 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | thaisoni | 64 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juan Sebastián Hermano | +4.28 | 61 | 55 |
| #2 | M4fChees~ | +1.92 | 71 | 42 |
| #3 | La Reyna <3 | +1.26 | 56 | 38 |
| #4 | yuh | -0.48 | 58 | 54 |
| #5 | thaisoni | -1.49 | 38 | 38 |





