








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 200 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 61 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3291 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,971 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2277 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2654 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2294 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1746 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,565,911 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 393 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kreamy | 42% | 76 |
| #2 | RoySaiYan | 40% | 97 |
| #3 | shwepp | 39% | 283 |
| #4 | Bert | 38% | 253 |
| #5 | ITS TIME | 38% | 341 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Bert | 38% | 253 |
| #5 | ITS TIME | 38% | 341 |
| #6 | NinjaElectron | 36% | 25 |
| #7 | bille... | 36% | 232 |
| #8 | bHIP! | 35% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shwepp | 13 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | ITS TIME | 11 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Bert | 10 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | bille... | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Kreamy | 4 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shwepp | 1259 | 0.22 | 32 min |
| #2 | ITS TIME | 841 | 0.13 | 17 min |
| #3 | Bert | 340 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #4 | bille... | 325 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #5 | Kreamy | 117 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shwepp | +3.48 | 66 | 72 |
| #2 | ITS TIME | +0.67 | 67 | 62 |
| #3 | Kreamy | +0.66 | 58 | 57 |
| #4 | fent cart | -0.95 | 41 | 42 |
| #5 | bHIP! | -1.41 | 63 | 55 |





