








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 158 matches | ||
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2644 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,839 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1483 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2134 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1957 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1265 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $574,885 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | - haa1zy | 91% | 23 |
| #2 | Fibas | 81% | 32 |
| #3 | dfk | 80% | 197 |
| #4 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | 75% | 55 |
| #5 | ㉑ Banzeba | 74% | 188 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Fibas | 81% | 32 |
| #3 | dfk | 80% | 197 |
| #4 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | 75% | 55 |
| #5 | ㉑ Banzeba | 74% | 188 |
| #6 | Bmf | 73% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dfk | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | 6 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | ㉑ Banzeba | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Bmf | 3 | 0.0050 |
| #5 | Fibas | 3 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dfk | 377 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #2 | ㉑ Banzeba | 330 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #3 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | 96 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Bmf | 78 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | - haa1zy | 65 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dfk | +6.25 | 76 | 73 |
| #2 | ㉑ Banzeba | +3.41 | 80 | 59 |
| #3 | Chr1stus | +2.74 | 67 | 49 |
| #4 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | +2.58 | 86 | 52 |
| #5 | - haa1zy | +1.51 | 70 | 61 |





