








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 474 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 203 matches | ||
| Premier | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4765 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,167 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4088 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4535 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5429 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 4115 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $778,129 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chr1stus | 80% | 197 |
| #2 | ㉑ Banzeba | 80% | 266 |
| #3 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | 77% | 179 |
| #4 | Bmf | 71% | 119 |
| #5 | Fibas | 65% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ㉑ Banzeba | 80% | 266 |
| #3 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | 77% | 179 |
| #4 | Bmf | 71% | 119 |
| #5 | Fibas | 65% | 95 |
| #6 | ggg | 63% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | 33 | 0.0104 |
| #2 | Bmf | 21 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | Fibas | 15 | 0.0083 |
| #4 | Chr1stus | 13 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | ㉑ Banzeba | 7 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ㉑ Banzeba | 436 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #2 | Bmf | 349 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #3 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | 312 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | Chr1stus | 298 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #5 | Fibas | 147 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ㉑ Banzeba | +5.13 | 82 | 57 |
| #2 | dfk | +4.99 | 76 | 70 |
| #3 | DESEMPREGADO E PERIGOSO | +3.42 | 85 | 46 |
| #4 | Chr1stus | +2.55 | 64 | 46 |
| #5 | Bmf | -0.85 | 46 | 56 |





