








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 26 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 121 matches | ||
| Premier | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2211 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,603 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2420 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3173 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1505 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2505 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $722,337 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | me when the | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | arctos | 62% | 42 |
| #3 | Chilla | 56% | 114 |
| #4 | Sithis | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | DanielH | 54% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Sithis | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | DanielH | 54% | 39 |
| #6 | Tyreek Hill | 53% | 149 |
| #7 | Penske | 50% | 123 |
| #8 | Fictionul | 49% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sithis | 6 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | Tyreek Hill | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Penske | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Chilla | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Fictionul | 4 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tyreek Hill | 576 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #2 | Penske | 565 | 0.21 | 18 min |
| #3 | Chilla | 518 | 0.21 | 13 min |
| #4 | DanielH | 233 | 0.28 | 8 min |
| #5 | Fictionul | 205 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DanielH | +4.13 | 71 | 82 |
| #2 | me when the | +3.61 | 87 | 58 |
| #3 | Sithis | +1.61 | 60 | 73 |
| #4 | Chilla | +1.01 | 75 | 70 |
| #5 | Penske | +0.07 | 73 | 74 |





