








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 714 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 104 matches | ||
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 50 matches | ||
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6831 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,823 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4783 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5728 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3892 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3420 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,664,862 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 972 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DanielH | 66% | 89 |
| #2 | Sithis | 63% | 104 |
| #3 | Lollypop | 62% | 93 |
| #4 | oats | 60% | 189 |
| #5 | Puppy Monkey Baby | 52% | 174 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ezstaysafe | 49% | 96 |
| #10 | May | 48% | 54 |
| #11 | Tyreek Hill | 48% | 100 |
| #12 | pcookie2222 | 45% | 143 |
| #13 | sticky fingers | 33% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sithis | 15 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | Penske | 10 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Chilla | 10 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Puppy Monkey Baby | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | pcookie2222 | 6 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Penske | 1437 | 0.21 | 41 min |
| #2 | Chilla | 1001 | 0.23 | 25 min |
| #3 | DanielH | 485 | 0.26 | 14 min |
| #4 | Puppy Monkey Baby | 475 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #5 | pcookie2222 | 371 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lollypop | +3.49 | 85 | 61 |
| #2 | Chilla | +2.27 | 79 | 69 |
| #3 | DanielH | +2.21 | 66 | 78 |
| #4 | Fictionul | +1.99 | 75 | 58 |
| #5 | oats | +0.97 | 66 | 34 |





