








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 454 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 172 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Esplay | 13 matches | 1,822 | |
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2240 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,072 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1895 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1862 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1614 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1701 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $910,857 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1214 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Jepi | 53% | 36 |
| #5 | Jepzonツ | 51% | 126 |
| #6 | M A D E | 50% | 16 |
| #7 | Toe | 48% | 159 |
| #8 | vego666 | 47% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toe | 46 | 0.0137 |
| #2 | Jepzonツ | 10 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Jepi | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | M A D E | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toe | +2.43 | 76 | 62 |
| #2 | vego666 | +2.10 | 81 | 59 |
| #3 | JekKU | +2.08 | 68 | 64 |
| #4 | Jepi | +0.94 | 84 | 56 |
| #5 | M A D E | +0.91 | 57 | 76 |





