










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 293 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 350 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3302 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,910 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1912 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3650 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3183 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3165 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,714,002 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 180 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | swat.cF | 40% | 55 |
| #12 | ChickenFuggets.cF | 40% | 85 |
| #13 | Gabagool | 40% | 58 |
| #14 | MARKERDTD | 37% | 27 |
| #15 | brothermo | 26% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gigi datome | 12 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | the white howard | 5 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | Trotis | 5 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | peter piper | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | ChickenFuggets.cF | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gigi datome | 348 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #2 | peter piper | 218 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | Dequavious Pork | 153 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | swat.cF | 149 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | 24-TrackClickSyncd2DaMoogModular | 132 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 24-TrackClickSyncd2DaMoogModular | +5.46 | 81 | 72 |
| #2 | peter piper | +2.34 | 74 | 60 |
| #3 | Gigi datome | +1.88 | 65 | 72 |
| #4 | Dequavious Pork | +1.87 | 78 | 70 |
| #5 | Trotis | +0.99 | 59 | 46 |





