








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 708 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 366 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3698 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,719 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3499 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4356 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4512 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3352 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $895,881 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 505 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vextex | 56% | 72 |
| #2 | Sugga | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | Azunyan | 48% | 258 |
| #4 | Perkeleme1ster | 48% | 370 |
| #5 | Toucanos | 48% | 305 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Perkeleme1ster | 48% | 370 |
| #5 | Toucanos | 48% | 305 |
| #6 | 💎Suspect | 48% | 120 |
| #7 | Kalaksi | 47% | 139 |
| #8 | Maco | 45% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Perkeleme1ster | 21 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Kalaksi | 15 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Azunyan | 11 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | 💎Suspect | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Toucanos | 5 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Perkeleme1ster | 1125 | 0.15 | 38 min |
| #2 | Toucanos | 528 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #3 | Azunyan | 526 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #4 | Maco | 193 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | 💎Suspect | 114 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Biggest Chungus | +1.88 | 82 | 61 |
| #2 | Maco | +1.69 | 67 | 57 |
| #3 | Sugga | +1.55 | 62 | 73 |
| #4 | Azunyan | -0.46 | 50 | 60 |
| #5 | Perkeleme1ster | -0.69 | 70 | 71 |





