








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 442 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1540 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,569 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1147 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1121 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1104 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 197 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $411,421 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 551 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tana92i | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | José le boucher | 58% | 24 |
| #3 | Zwix | 54% | 48 |
| #4 | Midori | 53% | 73 |
| #5 | REVY | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Midori | 53% | 73 |
| #5 | REVY | 50% | 16 |
| #6 | 😀😀😀 | 46% | 13 |
| #7 | VoRloX | 46% | 13 |
| #8 | sparkh | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Midori | 29 | 0.0212 |
| #2 | Zwix | 13 | 0.0142 |
| #3 | José le boucher | 11 | 0.0249 |
| #4 | Tana92i | 6 | 0.0400 |
| #5 | REVY | 2 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Midori | 310 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #2 | Zwix | 95 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | sparkh | 62 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| #4 | José le boucher | 39 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | 😀😀😀 | 38 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Midori | +1.82 | 75 | 61 |
| #2 | Tana92i | +1.42 | 68 | 55 |
| #3 | 😀😀😀 | +1.40 | 65 | 58 |
| #4 | MiniRehvaro° | +1.33 | 78 | 66 |
| #5 | José le boucher | +1.25 | 75 | 40 |





