








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 93 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
548 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 624 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 265 | 42% |
| Smokes | 86 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 132 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 141 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $204,794 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 😀😀😀 | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | MiniRehvaro <3 | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | MiniRehvaro° | 46% | 13 |
| #4 | sparkh | 40% | 5 |
| #5 | >90% HS | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Midori | 9 | 0.0168 |
| #2 | José le boucher | 5 | 0.0188 |
| #3 | Zerynox | 4 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | MiniRehvaro <3 | 3 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | MiniRehvaro° | 2 | 0.0082 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Midori | 131 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #2 | MiniRehvaro <3 | 61 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | Zwix | 52 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #4 | Zerynox | 48 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | >90% HS | 42 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiniRehvaro <3 | +4.31 | 80 | 64 |
| #2 | 😀😀😀 | +3.90 | 51 | 43 |
| #3 | MiniRehvaro° | +2.55 | 88 | 64 |
| #4 | >90% HS | +2.14 | 91 | 65 |
| #5 | Midori | +2.14 | 66 | 61 |





