








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 24 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2789 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,728 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1297 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1060 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1117 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1254 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $665,033 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 113 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Brensylvania | 44% | 142 |
| #6 | J0bro | 42% | 143 |
| #7 | STAR | 41% | 49 |
| #8 | purGedM4 | 38% | 91 |
| #9 | Chickeninja | 33% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0bro | 23 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Brensylvania | 10 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | JayTripp536_TTV | 6 | 0.0145 |
| #4 | Chickeninja | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | ♡ | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0bro | 960 | 0.31 | 26 min |
| #2 | purGedM4 | 428 | 0.22 | 13 min |
| #3 | Brensylvania | 347 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | Chickeninja | 108 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | STAR | 90 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Entity | +0.98 | 86 | 57 |
| #2 | Brensylvania | +0.73 | 59 | 56 |
| #3 | anthonysleftnut #13-18fps | +0.39 | 83 | 62 |
| #4 | J0bro | -0.13 | 81 | 77 |
| #5 | purGedM4 | -0.71 | 85 | 74 |





