








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1596 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 253 matches | ||
| Faceit | 193 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5826 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,198 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5744 | 28% |
| Smokes | 6965 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2718 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 4771 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,059,597 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 170 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Senn | 39% | 51 |
| #8 | purGedM4 | 37% | 65 |
| #9 | J0bro | 35% | 71 |
| #10 | ✪ Entity | 33% | 36 |
| #11 | Brensylvania | 29% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carson | +2.07 | 76 | 57 |
| #2 | Chickeninja | +1.40 | 78 | 63 |
| #3 | bdizzle™∞105ms | +0.73 | 61 | 64 |
| #4 | nok | +0.68 | 81 | 35 |
| #5 | ✪ Entity | +0.43 | 83 | 62 |





