








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 250 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Esplay | 14 matches | 1,516 | |
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
830 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,293 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 368 | 28% |
| Smokes | 557 | 43% |
| HE Grenades | 226 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 142 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $311,051 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MooX | 92% | 12 |
| #2 | AlucarD | 78% | 9 |
| #3 | jokotai | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | Taizz | 69% | 16 |
| #5 | Saijonaarasta | 62% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | AlucarD | 78% | 9 |
| #3 | jokotai | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | Taizz | 69% | 16 |
| #5 | Saijonaarasta | 62% | 13 |
| #6 | I LOVE SKINCLUB | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Taizz | 47 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | MooX | 35 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | I LOVE SKINCLUB | 31 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | jokotai | 27 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | Saijonaarasta | 23 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MooX | +2.27 | 77 | 63 |
| #2 | jokotai | +1.90 | 68 | 63 |
| #3 | Copperball666 | +1.62 | 64 | 37 |
| #4 | AlucarD | +0.43 | 31 | 44 |
| #5 | Taizz | -0.09 | 48 | 54 |





