








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 534 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 232 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4238 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,921 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1642 | 14% |
| Smokes | 2482 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3346 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4451 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,060,331 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 135 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -sant0- | 60% | 58 |
| #2 | Kenny S | 55% | 64 |
| #3 | pike | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | Dolphin | 50% | 107 |
| #5 | 0p7day | 49% | 505 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | GuiHori | 46% | 357 |
| #7 | FC | 46% | 91 |
| #8 | The Flying Dutchman | 45% | 107 |
| #9 | churcH | 44% | 54 |
| #10 | i planted a c4 at rpm raceway | 42% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0p7day | 8 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | FC | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | GuiHori | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Dolphin | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | -sant0- | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0p7day | 1240 | 0.14 | 23 min |
| #2 | Dolphin | 437 | 0.23 | 12 min |
| #3 | The Flying Dutchman | 361 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #4 | FC | 354 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #5 | i planted a c4 at rpm raceway | 275 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dolphin | +4.44 | 87 | 68 |
| #2 | Kenny S | +3.04 | 86 | 64 |
| #3 | FC | +2.44 | 79 | 66 |
| #4 | pike | +1.82 | 72 | 49 |
| #5 | churcH | +1.57 | 68 | 63 |





