








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
451 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,409 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1227 | 36% |
| Smokes | 411 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 1011 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 760 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $566,421 of utility $234 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Udium | 52% | 23 |
| #2 | Japanese Shia Labeouf | 50% | 14 |
| #3 | 木哈密 | 49% | 37 |
| #4 | heakingdon | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | chaewon | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Ken66950 | 29% | 14 |
| #11 | ✪⍨GOD⍨✪ | 29% | 14 |
| #12 | Whistle baby | 29% | 14 |
| #13 | YeetgerMeister | 28% | 25 |
| #14 | CHINA8964 | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _chaechae_1 | 7 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | 木哈密 | 5 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | maxloo2 | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Ken66950 | 2 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | heakingdon | 2 | 0.0079 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maxloo2 | 247 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #2 | _chaechae_1 | 198 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | 木哈密 | 75 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Udium | 57 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Whistle baby | 40 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eghh | +4.65 | 78 | 65 |
| #2 | CHINA8964 | +4.02 | 46 | 65 |
| #3 | Udium | +3.86 | 82 | 55 |
| #4 | 木哈密 | +3.18 | 75 | 51 |
| #5 | chaewon | +1.91 | 69 | 41 |





