








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 834 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4313 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,554 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3196 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2869 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1332 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 2157 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,917,231 of utility $256 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 917 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SexyHippo | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | Lui | 59% | 29 |
| #3 | FROST | 59% | 174 |
| #4 | Sorry? | 55% | 29 |
| #5 | Japanese Shia Labeouf | 54% | 102 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Rheneas | 52% | 23 |
| #7 | maxloo2 | 51% | 141 |
| #8 | 木哈密 | 50% | 36 |
| #9 | _chaechae_1 | 49% | 71 |
| #10 | Migga_Baboon | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maxloo2 | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | FROST | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | _chaechae_1 | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | 木哈密 | 3 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Migga_Baboon | 2 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FROST | 564 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | maxloo2 | 479 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #3 | Japanese Shia Labeouf | 223 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | _chaechae_1 | 144 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Migga_Baboon | 115 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SexyHippo | +5.23 | 84 | 56 |
| #2 | Udium | +3.58 | 86 | 61 |
| #3 | maxloo2 | +1.31 | 71 | 58 |
| #4 | 木哈密 | +1.00 | 72 | 50 |
| #5 | FROST | +0.67 | 49 | 69 |





