








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2629 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 306 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 115 matches | ||
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 221 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




75 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9365 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,246 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6142 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3811 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 7085 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 6208 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,721,897 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5659 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sh1zy | 65% | 96 |
| #2 | parkeur | 63% | 225 |
| #3 | daddiks | 60% | 82 |
| #4 | Sayuka | 59% | 167 |
| #5 | kAoTeK_IX | 58% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sh1zy | 65% | 96 |
| #2 | parkeur | 63% | 225 |
| #3 | daddiks | 60% | 82 |
| #4 | Sayuka | 59% | 167 |
| #5 | kAoTeK_IX | 58% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | parkeur | 15 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | Sayuka | 11 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | kAoTeK_IX | 9 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | daddiks | 9 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | sh1zy | 6 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sh1zy | 450 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #2 | parkeur | 341 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #3 | Sayuka | 306 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | kAoTeK_IX | 259 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | daddiks | 55 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RUKA | +4.99 | 96 | 65 |
| #2 | daddiks | +3.15 | 93 | 59 |
| #3 | kAoTeK_IX | +0.49 | 70 | 59 |
| #4 | Sayuka | +0.08 | 85 | 44 |
| #5 | sh1zy | -0.02 | 80 | 74 |





