










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 453 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 184 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1646 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,789 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 697 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1064 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2130 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 898 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,233,845 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 86 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | phylyp playin | 40% | 256 |
| #6 | Jan Glin | 39% | 186 |
| #7 | 那个 | 39% | 173 |
| #8 | mefX_ | 38% | 26 |
| #9 | jr smith of cs | 35% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GrabMati | 39 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | 那个 | 28 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | Ultimate | 18 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | Jan Glin | 13 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | jr smith of cs | 13 | 0.0108 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ultimate | 786 | 0.28 | 24 min |
| #2 | phylyp playin | 537 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #3 | GrabMati | 498 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #4 | 那个 | 345 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #5 | Jan Glin | 292 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mefX_ | +3.98 | 87 | 40 |
| #2 | Ultimate | +3.55 | 73 | 72 |
| #3 | 那个 | +3.13 | 61 | 53 |
| #4 | kilun | -0.04 | 31 | 69 |
| #5 | GrabMati | -0.65 | 52 | 62 |





