








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 452 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 236 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3833 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,565 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2437 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3854 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2094 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3180 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,011,380 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 946 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | arska | 66% | 35 |
| #2 | JaM | 65% | 31 |
| #3 | OskuZ | 64% | 44 |
| #4 | osba:D | 57% | 161 |
| #5 | KDQI | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | OskuZ | 64% | 44 |
| #4 | osba:D | 57% | 161 |
| #5 | KDQI | 55% | 29 |
| #6 | Petzku | 49% | 150 |
| #7 | putte | 46% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | putte | 9 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | osba:D | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | OskuZ | 6 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | Petzku | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | JaM | 5 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petzku | 542 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #2 | osba:D | 362 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | putte | 172 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | arska | 98 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | OskuZ | 86 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jere | +1.73 | 83 | 64 |
| #2 | osba:D | +1.47 | 81 | 56 |
| #3 | arska | -0.56 | 68 | 63 |
| #4 | Petzku | -0.64 | 65 | 67 |
| #5 | OskuZ | -0.69 | 68 | 62 |





