








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 561 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 356 matches | ||
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,794 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5640 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5276 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4403 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4475 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,497,849 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 485 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | arska | 58% | 31 |
| #2 | KDQI | 53% | 221 |
| #3 | osba:D | 49% | 78 |
| #4 | Jere | 49% | 150 |
| #5 | putte | 48% | 120 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | arska | 58% | 31 |
| #2 | KDQI | 53% | 221 |
| #3 | osba:D | 49% | 78 |
| #4 | Jere | 49% | 150 |
| #5 | putte | 48% | 120 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jere | 13 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | putte | 11 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | KDQI | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | osba:D | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KDQI | 616 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #2 | Jere | 450 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #3 | putte | 330 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | osba:D | 209 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #5 | arska | 100 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jere | +1.86 | 84 | 63 |
| #2 | osba:D | +1.59 | 80 | 58 |
| #3 | Petzku | +0.44 | 67 | 73 |
| #4 | putte | -0.37 | 74 | 52 |
| #5 | arska | -0.72 | 67 | 63 |





