








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3347 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,653 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3334 | 35% |
| Smokes | 3265 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1323 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 1731 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $742,648 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t1bmag | 71% | 35 |
| #2 | -s762a | 71% | 17 |
| #3 | TheDinkster | 69% | 55 |
| #4 | robbin yo hood | 68% | 28 |
| #5 | roxtedi | 59% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | .seth | 58% | 19 |
| #7 | Luke | 58% | 26 |
| #8 | braNdoFn | 56% | 34 |
| #9 | WaffleHouseCook | 55% | 49 |
| #10 | π·πΈπ²π | 48% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheDinkster | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | WaffleHouseCook | 5 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | π·πΈπ²π | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Luke | 3 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | t1bmag | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheDinkster | 197 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #2 | π·πΈπ²π | 140 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | braNdoFn | 95 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | roxtedi | 85 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | robbin yo hood | 66 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -s762a | +3.71 | 84 | 60 |
| #2 | Pops | +2.65 | 86 | 66 |
| #3 | TheDinkster | +2.41 | 76 | 65 |
| #4 | braNdoFn | +1.95 | 84 | 60 |
| #5 | robbin yo hood | +1.91 | 71 | 66 |





