








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1534 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 599 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8075 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,670 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4112 | 17% |
| Smokes | 8050 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 5416 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 7092 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,249,607 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [GTech] Epokolipse Clash.gg | 63% | 62 |
| #2 | Saerl | 63% | 56 |
| #3 | Xavah | 54% | 713 |
| #4 | sallad | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | XSaber9298 | 53% | 408 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Saerl | 63% | 56 |
| #3 | Xavah | 54% | 713 |
| #4 | sallad | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | XSaber9298 | 53% | 408 |
| #6 | RD Sniper | 44% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xavah | 19 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | XSaber9298 | 4 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | RD Sniper | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | sallad | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | [GTech] Epokolipse Clash.gg | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xavah | 2512 | 0.17 | 71 min |
| #2 | XSaber9298 | 394 | 0.05 | 14 min |
| #3 | RD Sniper | 215 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | sallad | 77 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Saerl | 38 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saerl | +1.26 | 82 | 48 |
| #2 | Xavah | +0.97 | 79 | 63 |
| #3 | Sn0w | +0.87 | 54 | 54 |
| #4 | sallad | -0.63 | 63 | 49 |
| #5 | RD Sniper | -0.69 | 59 | 54 |





