








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 105 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1976 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,551 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1980 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2192 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2142 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2237 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $421,066 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ToodlesGaming | 58% | 78 |
| #2 | YoshiTheTaxEvadingNonce | 54% | 84 |
| #3 | balls 在线翻译服务 | 52% | 27 |
| #4 | Vlhalla | 48% | 46 |
| #5 | Raix | 44% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | balls 在线翻译服务 | 52% | 27 |
| #4 | Vlhalla | 48% | 46 |
| #5 | Raix | 44% | 32 |
| #6 | Venturian | 41% | 70 |
| #7 | Sh4duw | 40% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Venturian | 12 | 0.0085 |
| #2 | ToodlesGaming | 10 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | Sh4duw | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Raix | 4 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | Vlhalla | 3 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sh4duw | 226 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | ToodlesGaming | 173 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | Vlhalla | 152 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | Raix | 140 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #5 | YoshiTheTaxEvadingNonce | 126 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vlhalla | +2.87 | 86 | 59 |
| #2 | ToodlesGaming | +1.45 | 46 | 52 |
| #3 | nameless. | +1.09 | 65 | 56 |
| #4 | Sh4duw | +0.22 | 59 | 62 |
| #5 | Raix | -0.15 | 61 | 62 |





