








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1220 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 636 matches | ||
| Premier | 240 matches | ||
| Faceit | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Renown | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8677 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,508 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7416 | 21% |
| Smokes | 9171 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 8688 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 9233 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,080,112 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 482 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Venturian | 58% | 171 |
| #2 | YoshiTheTaxEvadingNonce | 56% | 91 |
| #3 | Vlhalla | 55% | 347 |
| #4 | balls 在线翻译服务 | 51% | 138 |
| #5 | ToodlesGaming | 50% | 339 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | YoshiTheTaxEvadingNonce | 56% | 91 |
| #3 | Vlhalla | 55% | 347 |
| #4 | balls 在线翻译服务 | 51% | 138 |
| #5 | ToodlesGaming | 50% | 339 |
| #6 | Sh4duw | 48% | 686 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Venturian | 21 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | ToodlesGaming | 14 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Sh4duw | 12 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Vlhalla | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | balls 在线翻译服务 | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sh4duw | 1214 | 0.11 | 27 min |
| #2 | Vlhalla | 1011 | 0.15 | 28 min |
| #3 | ToodlesGaming | 807 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #4 | balls 在线翻译服务 | 286 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #5 | Venturian | 253 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vlhalla | +3.14 | 82 | 66 |
| #2 | Raix | +0.92 | 67 | 58 |
| #3 | ToodlesGaming | +0.03 | 47 | 53 |
| #4 | Sh4duw | -0.58 | 58 | 61 |
| #5 | Venturian | -1.50 | 35 | 43 |





