








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 118 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1534 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,255 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 491 | 22% |
| Smokes | 999 | 44% |
| HE Grenades | 413 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 352 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $571,165 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | buzzkii | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | KaeM | 63% | 8 |
| #3 | Forever Young | Lek Tau Cui | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | ga0u | 54% | 48 |
| #5 | Count Tools | 53% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Vinsmoke | 33% | 57 |
| #10 | Dudu | 29% | 24 |
| #11 | Legna | 29% | 21 |
| #12 | Hachi Bee | 27% | 15 |
| #13 | MAX | 14% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vinsmoke | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | V-God | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | ga0u | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Dudu | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | MAX | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | V-God | 115 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #2 | ga0u | 99 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Vinsmoke | 63 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | Dudu | 45 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Legna | 37 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R4don | +3.41 | 78 | 38 |
| #2 | Forever Young | Lek Tau Cui | +1.66 | 74 | 60 |
| #3 | ga0u | +1.43 | 76 | 52 |
| #4 | V-God | -0.22 | 86 | 52 |
| #5 | Dudu | -0.47 | 94 | 46 |





