








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1457 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 427 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 408 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 69 matches | ||
| Premier | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 44 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




66 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12173 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,181 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3115 | 43% |
| Smokes | 1587 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1554 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 925 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,106,298 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2426 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | make | 58% | 213 |
| #2 | Divine | 51% | 197 |
| #3 | Ruski=Troll Ilse Koch | 47% | 295 |
| #4 | ricky dicky doo dah christmas | 47% | 257 |
| #5 | wings | 46% | 246 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ricky dicky doo dah christmas | 75 | 0.0164 |
| #2 | make | 72 | 0.0172 |
| #3 | t | 62 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | ciya | 56 | 0.0256 |
| #5 | wings | 54 | 0.0111 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wings | 990 | 0.20 | 22 min |
| #2 | t | 576 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #3 | Divine | 561 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #4 | Ruski=Troll Ilse Koch | 538 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #5 | ricky dicky doo dah christmas | 307 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wings | +3.66 | 87 | 60 |
| #2 | Divine | +2.87 | 70 | 42 |
| #3 | make | +1.78 | 62 | 49 |
| #4 | flowerss | +1.53 | 53 | 21 |
| #5 | ricky dicky doo dah christmas | +1.38 | 39 | 24 |





