








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 448 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 381 matches | ||
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5443 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,593 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2569 | 15% |
| Smokes | 4806 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6496 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 3722 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,448,459 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1510 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | SoyTroy | 49% | 63 |
| #8 | Niklas395 | 47% | 154 |
| #9 | ►Alpha† | 46% | 112 |
| #10 | OnF1re | IchLiebePelmeni | 43% | 111 |
| #11 | Olec | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoyTroy | 27 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | SoyTroy | 14 | 0.0116 |
| #3 | ✪ Alect | 11 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Myrdin | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Olec | 6 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoyTroy | 1721 | 0.20 | 39 min |
| #2 | ✪ Alect | 607 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #3 | Myrdin | 436 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #4 | ►Alpha† | 390 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #5 | saim1nn :v | 286 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SoyTroy | +4.73 | 82 | 75 |
| #2 | ✪ Alect | +2.24 | 86 | 64 |
| #3 | SoyTroy | +2.11 | 73 | 72 |
| #4 | ►Alpha† | +1.04 | 75 | 59 |
| #5 | Niklas395 | +0.38 | 69 | 60 |





