








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 341 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3213 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,225 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1295 | 14% |
| Smokes | 2501 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2668 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2761 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,702,830 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 564 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | veeR | 59% | 39 |
| #2 | KILLACAM | 56% | 163 |
| #3 | Sean | 56% | 98 |
| #4 | scry | 54% | 146 |
| #5 | say | 53% | 253 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | KILLACAM | 56% | 163 |
| #3 | Sean | 56% | 98 |
| #4 | scry | 54% | 146 |
| #5 | say | 53% | 253 |
| #6 | OppaUwU | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | say | 15 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | scry | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | KILLACAM | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Sean | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | OppaUwU | 2 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KILLACAM | 610 | 0.18 | 20 min |
| #2 | say | 502 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #3 | scry | 480 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #4 | Sean | 80 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | OppaUwU | 45 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KILLACAM | +2.52 | 79 | 74 |
| #2 | say | +1.31 | 85 | 64 |
| #3 | Sean | +0.18 | 71 | 51 |
| #4 | scry | +0.16 | 69 | 63 |
| #5 | ∩ (◣_◢) ∩ | -0.63 | 58 | 45 |





